can we talk about how hostile this site is now

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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by Pufflehugs »

This thread in a nutshell
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by EvilPinkamina »

eblu, this isn't off topic. Your post is discussing the toxic behavior of the community, claiming the community is toxic. We are discussing the community, but instead of specifically discussing the site, we're talking through the discord as that is another medium for which conflict has spread through the community.

The reason you dont get all these in jokes is because you aren't involving yourself in the community, or are always pushing yourself away. You know whenever you discuss politics, many of the people in the discord will get upset for the sole reason that there are many LGBT people in the discord. I'm not going to pretend like I understand every in joke because a lot of them were made before I involved myself, but if you do involve yourself and stay out of topics where you know there will be a divide, you'll end up enjoying the place a lot more.
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by eblu »

EvilPinkamina wrote:Your post is discussing the toxic behavior of the community, claiming the community is toxic. We are discussing the community, but instead of specifically discussing the site, we're talking through the discord as that is another medium for which conflict has spread through the community.
the website is a front end for the community. if any potential users don't see anything positive happening then they're gonna be scared off
EvilPinkamina wrote:The reason you dont get all these in jokes is because you aren't involving yourself in the community, or are always pushing yourself away.
yes, that is true. however these things come out of literally nowhere and catch on so suddenly that i frequently get the idea that it's been an in-joke for far longer than it actually has been. i've been trying to be a bit more active on both media however.
EvilPinkamina wrote:if you do involve yourself and stay out of topics where you know there will be a divide, you'll end up enjoying the place a lot more.
this is definitely a good prospect. the only thing that keeps this from being a great idea with no counterargument is that without fail, unlike previous years where there was much more varied active discussion, most active topics seem to revolve around politics which means if i want to stay in an active community then i pretty much have to participate. this might just be me being skewed since i check for activity far more than i should but to me this is a problem.
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by EvilPinkamina »

Honestly, I agree that there are too many political topics, with most of them seemingly coming out of spite. I even expressed this frustration in the Venezuela topic. Only way to really prevent all the politics is to create not political topics.
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by Mamkute »

Despite Fox saying this seemed on topic, I would say this has definitely dereailed from eboy's initial topic.
Don't get me wrong, discussing hostility on the site, and discussing many many many problems users have with each other/the discord/ "veterans" are related.
Eboy summarized the difference fairly well. Perhaps a more general "airing of grievances" topic would be better suited. Because it is pretty clear eboy didn't want this topic to be that.
eblu wrote:the website is a front end for the community. if any potential users don't see anything positive happening then they're gonna be scared off
This is an important prospect.

And Puffle, along with anyone else, really, stop posting pictures with only a sentence about the state of the topic. No one needs visual representations of the topic.
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by Mephilesfan1 »

there's hostility on this website? there's a discord? jeez what else don't i know

i am being serious i'm not being sarcastic
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by Bunelody »

^there is a discord if you're interested ! Just pm me and I'll hand you the link! (Sorry for being offtopic)
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by Nano »

What exactly was his topic about though? He seemed to make a radical change to what this topic was about.

Like it started at first with "CI has become nothing more than a breeding ground for bandwagons, neglect, and blind hatred (Nice joke from the devout anti-gay christian btw)" but then 8 pages later after posting "you all are just proving my point" a few times he manages to finally say what he "really meant" which was...

"the fact that just about every discussion here now ends in an argument and an inevitable lock, with random insults and off-topic jokes being thrown everywhere."

Wait hold-up what? Like seriously, how is that at all anything like he said at the beginning? It's gone from "the users here start bandwagons, the forums are being neglected with no topics being made, and everyone is hating one another" to "well discussion is happening, but it's ending in arguments and locks" (which i 100% do not agree with, but that's beside the point). He ignored the users starting bandwagons bit, and did a whole 180 on his statement about the forum being dead, and he's calling out people for off-topic posts when for the first 8 pages the dude posted 1 gif and a one sentence remark about how we're all just proving his point.

"i made this to talk about the general feelings of hostility in the community in general and what we could possibly eventually do so that things aren't so bitter."

Well geez that sure doesn't sound like what he said 11 posts ago. I don't recall him opening up discussion on how we can fix this "problem" when he first started this topic, but now that he's saying it now then clearly it must've been the point of the topic all along. I must've missed it after he said "just my two cents" acting as if this was the end of discussion and that there was nothing more he wanted to say about it.

I don't think eblu knows what this is meant to be at all anymore than I do. Maybe he had an idea of what he wanted at the beginning, but it's since evolved way past that because of how generalized and brash his statement was. He wasn't clear about his point, and his clearing up about the point was just him making an entirely different point. In fact, this new point seemed to be catered to match a certain narrative of this whole topic being off topic because his point all along was how things go off topic despite not ever at all saying any of these things in the initial post.

But I mean, when your initial post is a wide blanket statement on the discord (which is exactly what it is. It's not about how everyone on ci is hostile, it's about how you think people from the discord are hostile) that isn't very well thought out (seemed to be just rushed to be made without at all thinking about evidence of these things happening, making his point clearer, etc.) and in general just begging to be torn apart and corrected I guess it's kinda expected that the topic would "derail" a bit.

I do want to say that I think he's right in what he was saying about positive happenings on the forum. I'm sure topics like this are going to scare people off, especially when the name of the topic is "can we talk about how hostile this site is now" (Which by the way, for someone so worried about the forum's image and how it looks to potential users he really really picked the perfect name to reel em in. Ironic a bit if you ask me).
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by EvilPinkamina »

I mean originally it was talkin bout the site until someone mentioned CI being a circlejerk and started throwing around the clique word as if they were being excluded, then discussion about discord sprung up.
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by Crazo3077 »

So I'm going to try something different. I thought about this most of the day, and thought about how the worst "hostile" is really broad and unclear. I want to request we turn this into a project for everyone participating. To me, that means rephrasing the term "hostile" to "unfriendly" and I want to encourage everyone to list off what they think is "unfriendly" about the community. You can list behaviors you've seen or specific instances with users, but just focus on how you felt during the experience, ya know?

Personally, I don't see much as unfriendly, especially not anymore. We (or just I, honestly) used to be a lot ruder to new users who show up with questions, but now we tend to be more considerate. I feel like I haven't turned down any friendships, but I also think I'm pretty busy with work. I kinda wanted to say this as framing.

I do think it is unfriendly when users assume secret motives. Like I try to be really on-the-surface about stuff, but when people think that I must be up to something, then it just puts a sour taste in my mouth.

I also think it is unfriendly to group people together while making hard claims. Like I grouped people together for a joke, but regularly we're hearing terms like "the discord server" or "the vets" and those terms refer to way more people than are even relevant to the discussion. If you don't get specific, you're just going to upset people.

I mean this is just a start, but if we're going to try to focus on bringing the probably to surface, we should at least be defining hostility, and I think unfriendliness, and specific acts of it, are the best way to make it clear what the problem is.
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by Triert »

viewtopic.php?f=23&t=48531

Whose idea was this? Better yet, if there wasn't a single person who told anyone there to show up then why mock people like this? If I missed responses earlier, then let's start again.
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by Mephilesfan1 »

i don't really think there's a whole lot unfriendly about this place.but to be fair i don't really visit here too often anymore either so, my input is probably not of much value. the only thing i notice is that some people feel left out. i don't personally but i have noticed it with some others.
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by Triert »

Also, six words.

"Hostile" "Unfriendly"
"Clique" "Circle of friends"

I think we can all do without the semantics.
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by Nano »

Mephilesfan1 wrote:the only thing i notice is that some people feel left out.
DING DING DING

Weeeeeee got ourselves a winner!!!

Mephilesfan1 strikes the nail on the head! Contrary to popular belief, the problem isn't necessarily with the discord itself, but a few handful of people who have trouble integrating into a community. Is this vocal minority correct in their assumptions that the discord is an unfriendly, solitary group who only allow in veterans? Let's check the survey!
Spoiler:
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Ooooh! Sorry bout that, looks like you'll be going home with the runner up prize. Retro, tell em what they've won.

"The good news Nano, is that they won't be going home empty handed. In fact, they're getting 5 copies of Overwatch Origins Edition! Now you too can relive the fall of Star_ and ruin your friendships with others!"

Thanks Retro! As for Mephilesfan1, you get an all expenses paid trip to the Bahamas! Enjoy some martinis on the beach and have some fun in the sun!

Well that ends today's episode of "Chao Island Feud", I hope we all learned something today. Remember, "If you want to be accepted in a community, be prepared to work for it a bit! Be prepared to know that not everyone is going to agree with you! Also, more than likely it's a YOU problem!"

Goodnight everyone!
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by Triert »

You don't mean to imply they're the only community do you?
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by EvilPinkamina »

Triert wrote:viewtopic.php?f=23&t=48531

Whose idea was this? Better yet, if there wasn't a single person who told anyone there to show up then why mock people like this? If I missed responses earlier, then let's start again.
REEEEEEEEEEE THZ IS X-ACTLY TEH CLCIK BEHAVEYOUR I WAZ REFERIG 2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! QUIT OPRESSING MMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by Triert »

If I'm already considered a problem by people do you really think saying that is going to shame me enough to turn around and give up?
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by EvilPinkamina »

I wasn't trying to shame you. I was making fun of something hilarious you said.
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by eblu »

nano you could have just said that the discord lets everyone in. you're coming off as rude there pal
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by EvilPinkamina »

I think nano's just tired of the "the vets are hostile because they aren't catering to me."
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by Triert »

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Are we going to address the mock topic or are we going to pretend that didn't happen again.
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by Tsui »

Nano wrote:Be prepared to know that not everyone is going to agree with you!
Tell me more.
Nano wrote:Also, more than likely it's a YOU problem!"
Sounds pretty far from accepting to me. Might even call it "unfriendly".
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by Pumpkinium »

i lost track but like, people keep saying 'don't put the blame on everyone besides yourself, it's not healthy.' or 'you might be the problem.' as if most people here don't know that already. i do know that myself, i'm trying to be critical of myself in light of this, but also like.. don't just say that and then not be critical of yourself as well. i don't think any of us here are innocent for what's going on.
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by Triert »

and i especially understand i'm not the best at this.
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Re: can we talk about how hostile this site is now

Post by EvilPinkamina »

Triert wrote:Image

Are we going to address the mock topic or are we going to pretend that didn't happen again.
No one is pretending it didn't happen. You're just the only one who is bothered by it. It's obviously a joke thread fueled by your "REEE TEH KLIK IZ EXCLUDING ME" mentality. It's even in the forum for jokes, with other threads like "How To Infuriate a Communist," "post Saonic memes," and "funnier jokessssdj of the day :)))))." Any genuine offense is just you being overly sensitive about nothing.

Oh, and I suppose I need a reaction image or you'll ignore my post completely. One moment...

Image
Pumpkinium wrote:i lost track but like, people keep saying 'don't put the blame on everyone besides yourself, it's not healthy.' or 'you might be the problem.' as if most people here don't know that already. i do know that myself, i'm trying to be critical of myself in light of this, but also like.. don't just say that and then not be critical of yourself as well. i don't think any of us here are innocent for what's going on.
All of your problems with the server are either reactions to your behavior or things you want other people to do for you, without providing the same in return. You've yet to show that you're actually willing to change and have instead called your problems with the server the fault of everyone around you. When any form of confrontation arises, Wolf/Lamb is always there to try clean up. This leads to people not wanting to be upfront with you, since you get defensive over every minor detail.
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